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(Geckos walking out of burning liquor store)
Seth: What did I tell you? What did I say to you? I said, "Buy the road map and leave."
Richard: What the fuck am I supposed to do, Seth? He recognized us!
Seth: He didn't recognize shit.
Richard: Seth, I'm telling you, the way he looked at us, you especially, I knew he knew.
Seth: Low profile! Do you understand the meaning of the words "low profile?"
Richard: "Hey Richie, how's your hand?" It hurts like a fucking son of a bitch, Seth! Thanks for asking.
Seth (interrupting): Let me tell you what low profile is not. It is not taking girls hostage, it is not shooting police, it is not setting fire to a building!
Richard: Bitch, bitch, bitch.
(Geckos drive off)
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Seth: Rule #1: No noise, no questions. If you make a noise, Mr. .44 makes a noise. If you ask a question, Mr. .44 answers it. Now are you absolutely, positively clear about rule #1?
Gloria: Yes.
Seth: Rule #2: You do what we say, when we say it. If you don't, see rule #1. Rule #3, (puts gun to Gloria's head) don't you ever try and fucking run on us, 'cause I got six little friends and they can all run faster than you can.
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Kate: Where are you taking us?
Richie: Mexico.
Kate: What's in Mexico?
Richie: Mexicans.
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Chet Pussy: All right! Pussy, pussy, pussy! Come on in, pussy lovers! Here at the Titty Twister, we're slashing pussy in half! Give us an offer on our vast selection of pussy! This is a pussy blowout! All right, we got white pussy, black pussy, Spanish pussy, yellow pussy! We got hot pussy, cold pussy, we got wet pussy, we got smelly pussy, we got hairy pussy, bloody pussy, we got snappin' pussy! We got silk pussy, velvet pussy, Naugahyde pussy! We even got horse pussy, dog pussy, chicken pussy, come on in pussy lovers! If we don't got it, you don't want it! Come on in pussy lovers!
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Chet Pussy: Attention pussy shoppers! Take advantage of our penny pussy sale! If you buy one piece of pussy at the regular price, you get another piece of pussy of equal or lesser value for only a penny! Try and beat pussy for a penny! If you can find cheaper pussy anywhere, fuck it! (laughs)
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Frost (looking around at dead vampires): Ain't they supposed to burn up or something? (vampires ignite)
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Kate: Are you okay?
Seth: I'm peachy, Kate. The world's my oyster. Except for the fact that I just...I just rammed a wooden stake into my brother's chest because he turned into a vampire, even though I don't believe in vampires. Aside from that unfortunate business, everything's hunky-dory.
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Sex Machine: So what's your name, darlin'?
Kate: Kate. What's yours?
Sex Machine: Sex Machine, pleased to meet you.
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Jacob: Does anybody know what's going on here?
Seth: I know what's going on...we got a bunch of fuckin' vampires out there trying to get in here and suck our fuckin' blood. And that's it, plain and simple. And I don't want to hear anything about "I don't believe in vampires," because I don't fucking believe in vampires, but I believe in my own two eyes, and what I saw is fucking vampires. Now do we all agree that what we are dealing with is vampires?
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Jacob: Has anybody here read a real book about vampires, or are we just remembering what some movie said? I mean a real book.
Sex Machine: You mean like a Time-Life book?
Jacob: I'll take it the answer is no.
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Seth: So which are you, Jacob? A faithless preacher? Or are you a mean motherfuckin' servant of God?
Jacob: I'm a mean m... m... servant of God.
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Carlos: What, were they psychos, or...?
Seth: Did they look like psychos? Is that what they looked like? They were vampires. Psychos do not explode when sunlight hits them, I don't give a fuck how crazy they are.
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Seth: I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fucking bastard.
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